Christmas ‘thrival’ guide: relatives, relationships and hormone disruption
The abundant joy of Christmas is a wonderful thing, but those heightened expectations and individual wants and needs are also a recipe for the traditional Christmas Day row. We have written before about how menopause can have an impact on relationships as well as the individual, and the high running emotions of the holidays don't help.
In a survey by Relate – the relationship support service - 68% of people expected to row over the Christmas holidays. We thought we would start by looking at the top causes of Christmas Day arguments. According to Psychotherapist Neil Wilkie, the top causes of Christmas Day blowups fall into six 'groups':
- People creating too much mess
- When one person feels they're doing all the work
- Not listening to one another
- Mobile phones taking priority
- Not listening to one another
- Not feeling as though gifts/actions are appreciated
So, when faced with hormone disruption, what can you do to support yourself and your relationships over the holidays?
Fresh air and exercise
The traditional Christmas Day walk has a very important purpose - to get everyone out of the house and into the fresh air. Exercise, in our opinion, is one of the great healers. It boosts the mood, makes us feel better in our own bodies and soothes the mind. In fact, a study found that exercising three hours a week for a year improved physical and mental health in a group of menopausal women. Whether it's with everyone else or on your own, make outdoor exercise a priority.
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Make space for yourself
Whether you spend a day or a week with the family, it can be an intense period of time. Maybe you're hosting, maybe you're going to someone else's home where you don't feel you have control over your time. It's ok to carve out a little space to be apart from it all for a little while - go for a lay down, a morning run, meditate for 10 minutes, take the dog out - whatever you need to regroup for a bit.
Remember it's a team effort
Even though you might be the one experiencing hormone change, it's not purely your responsibility to help create a harmonious environment. It's in everyone's interests, and everyone needs to contribute. It's also important that other people understand that you're going through something and that you might need a little extra support. However, they can only know that if you communicate. Always easier said than done, but when you're not feeling strung out, try to take a moment to explain where you may need some help over the holidays. Most frustrations come from a lack of understanding.
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Use aromatherapy to set the mood
Setting the scene for a restful environment can help to make it manifest. While the scents of seasonal cooking are one of the great joys of Christmas, you can also use aromatherapy to help set the collective mood at the start and end of the day, or to influence your own mood if you feel like things are getting on top of you.
For example, you can place diffusers with intentional essential oils around the house, you can burn aromatherapy candles to create an ambient and positive atmosphere, and (a personal favourite), you can use roll on aromatherapy to have an instant impact on your own mood. We particularly love our calming and relaxing lavender, neroli and camomile roll on, & breathe.
